dalam banyak-banyak van, van apa yang boleh dimakan?

i just finished recalculating for my financial planning.

with time, some major changes will happen in your life and knowing that, you should recalculate your financial progress and think of ways to maximize your profit.

we had an inspiring minum petang with my foster father about how he became a millionaire. and today when i met my friends we shared about which is better- ASB saving or ASB financing. after much study and calculations, we arrived at the conclusion that the latter is more rewarding.

and a colleague also noted about an ASB loan package by RHB whereby we only have to pay for the interest for the first 3 years and only start to pay the principle after that 3 years. if, we want to terminate the loan before we start paying for the principle we can do so and take out the dividends to start a fresh loan. im still studying into that.

with my financial planning so far, with God's will everything go smooth i can confidently say that i can become a millionaire before i retire.

which brings me back to the question- why do i want to be a millionaire/multimillionaire?

perhaps the number 1 reason is that im already tired and am done with financial barriers. therefore i want to have that financial freedom as soon as possible.

and of course, for the future of my family.

and third, as a welfare for me in akhiraat.

ya Allah, please guide us the way, bring us ease through our plans, save us from undesirable mishaps and grant us 'us' until forever...ameen, ameen, ameen ya Allah...

ginormica

it has been a while, again.

i just remembered about replenishing my bloggish thirst and when i saw the previous title it made me resembled about how my life has been up and down like a roller coaster with the switch off of 2010 and the brand new coming of 2011. apart from that, i cannot complain.

there has been some changes with the new year, either they happen coincidentally or not. the first one is the change of weather; resulting a sudden shift in focus from geophysical acquisition work that i had been doing enthusiastically so far to geophysical processing job which conveniently came to fill in my time. the truth and inconvenient (thus challenging) part of it is that i am an official zero-knowledge-brain owner of geophysical processing. compared to other colleagues who have at least a basic skill at knowing what NMO stands for i am no different at all from someone who has never heard of the word geophysical processing at all.

after several weeks indulging myself into processing world i found out that i have grown more pimples and eyebags; which although from what i have found was actually due to lack of exercise (see para 6); have made me visibly more stressful and timid. at more times i found loneliness more of a friend than people, and i could get irritated more easily because i keep on feeling disappointed with myself for not knowing (about processing) and sometimes at even the very silly little things. plus, competitions from dear colleagues who are somehow can keep their interest at respected level from 8 till 5 and seniors' expectations made my heart feel squeezed into juice. to be honest, it's a feeling i cannot feel at ease about. i wanted some time off, but i couldnt. i knew that sooner or later, i still have to face them out and close this gap. once and for all, i hope. for the better, ey.

so i kept on crawling. i scratched through notes and reports and transmittals and websites, i asked questions and raised issues. i tried to think more and do more, although i sometimes felt that they were too much that i wanted to vomit. when i did feel so, i took some time off and played my ipad, or surf through the net. my loved ones keep me going, although some havent. i am still waiting for them to change for the best of their own. oh my beloved family.

i realized that i have neglected my physical exercise when i read an ad at the LRT station: "physical activities help your body to detox itself through perspiration, thus promotes healthier and glowing skin". i reflected on my eyebags and pimples growing at the side of my forehead where i used to perspire the most during exercises and realized what i had been missing so far despite my success in maintaining my body weight's range by +-2kgs - the joy, relief, destress, and sweat i gained from exercising. i started to imagine the shortness in breath, the urge for more effort to complete more push ups, the free movements i can make with all the parts of my body. they are tantalizing and always make me feel fresh. i had barely the time to do all those things; i had been concentrating more on my job and family time and doing financial planning. i forgot to enjoy with myself.

thus i made up my mind to spend at least 20 minutes to exercise in my room. i made push ups, i did static running, i did sit ups, i put on the music, i danced, i laughed. i deliberated myself. God it felt so good. and the best part is, i feel better now, alhamdulillah.

and after consultation with an employee at a pharmacy, i had been told on how to apply the eye-roll that i had bought correctly. actually i thought that it didnt work so i would like to try another one, with her consultation i found that wasnt needed; i only have to work on how to correctly apply it under my eyes and massage the area to make the toxin that causes the eyebags to go away. tips on better sleep, destress and also healthier lifestyle were also discussed. i saved money and gained new knowledge- another plus :)

regarding the processing work, i can feel that my seniors are starting to acknowledge my effort in studying processing and are giving me more chances and sharing more knowledge they have, which i found out not only more enriching but lifting away a lot of burden of expectations from my shoulder as well. i feel more trusted not only by them but more importantly by myself, because before all i know is that i am a processing stupidos who can only ask stupid questions which makes eyes roll in disbelief. but now i know that there are more and more info that i can relate with and are building up. ya Allah, please ease our tasks for us. ameen3...with acquisition i actually have a problematic project; my team members and me had put in a lot of effort into getting it done and had been hit and bombed a lot by our bosses, people from different departments and contractors because of it and as watson in sherlock holmes said

"I've been reviewing my notes, of our exploits over the last seven months.

would you like to know my conclusion?


I AM PSYCHOLOGICALLY DISTURBED."

haha~

yes, sometimes it wasnt funny at all. but since the project we have known each other well and learnt a hell lot about seismic acquisition especially the operational matters; it always amaze us (isnt it?) on how the very difficult things could be the most beneficial. but still, it has been the pain in my backbone. after yesterday i was still thinking what can actually make it worse since it has always been that way but there's light at the end of the tunnel, perhaps and lets say it positively that we can sort it out eventually, with peace. insyaAllah, ameen3...

and the most interesting part in all this is that I CAN NOW COMPLETE SUDOKU! so far i had completed 11 sets (+ more from ipads i didnt count) with an average timing for Medium level of around 35 minutes, and yesterday i completed a Hard one with 16.38 minutes in timing! clap clap clapppp..i am so proud of my teacher..hehe~ thank you dear.. :)

i'll keep rolling to let off more dirt and smudge from the entire me =) ya Allah please show us light, give us strength, patience and success and keep us healthy and away from unwanted disturbances and adversities...ameen ameen ameen ya Allah..

p/s: dear Adah, happy 13th birthday.. ;)

the explosion of a candy factory

i woke up this morning feeling barely sober; and although i'm doing okay i kept on wondering what i would fill up this day with, apart from the obvious of course. i need to increase my adrenalin level again; i havent been shopping for long and i miss watching movies with him and anything related to his presence. the last sane food i ate (from what i can remember) was bubur lambuk which his mother bought from pasar tani and the last picture i scrutinized was a picture of us taken by his younger brother. how, with all my intelligence and brain capacity could i never fully fathom how i ended up with him- someone i have always waited and longing for and with whom, even though i can lay out a thousand things about him i still am learning to know the rest of him which i can never find enough, as well as reasons on how i am here beside him when there are a million other chances that i am not, and im not even tired of missing him a pinch.

ANYWAY. did you know that Malaysia now has a government body called Special Innovation Unit (Unik) and that the machine that we usually see in hospitals which beeps accordingly with a patient's heart beat is called electrocardiography?

there really are serious huge pile of stuffs to learn out here on earth. i feel like making my desk crowded and in mess again. lets lets!

i thank God and mr nordin for this new CPU, it works way better from my old one. i even been teased by seniors for its slow performance; they said my pc is slow like its owner. and when iPerintis personnel had it checked remotely, he asked me how long have i been patient with this underperforming pc. i said to him, '6 months,' and i heard him gasped, so i continued, 'really.'

but then i managed to set up a new CPU which was a relief; i can now do my work much faster and i dont have to wait long for files to open or download.

im now imagining myself wandering around mid valley doing, well, practically nothing; which is for me, an arbitrary to window shopping. i actually went to isetan this afternoon, with an aim to spend/shop on office clothes. however it wasnt achieved- the ones i wanted to buy were all not discounted. i conclude then that contrary to what rahimi said that i know nothing about fashion and brands, my intuition always point me to high-taste styles and wearings, which are at the moment, regrettably, are yet to be affordable.

i'll find those which have styles but are much more reasonable in price, then; usually in a less urban locations.

i am having ADD right now, which i cannot help, and its expanding every minute.

p/s: At-Tirmidzi meriwayatkan dari Abu Hurairah bahwa Rasulullah bersabda, “Ada tiga golongan yang pasti akan ditolong oleh Allah; seorang budak yang ingin menebus dirinya dengan mencicil kepada tuannya, orang yang ingin menikah karena ingin memelihara kesucian, dan pejuang di jalan Allah.”

— HR. At-Tirmidzi (no. 1352) kitab an-Nikaah, Ibnu Majah (no. 1512) dan dihasankan oleh Syaikh al-Albani dalam al-Misykaah (no. 3089), Shahiih an-Nasa-i (no. 3017), dan Shahiihul Jaami’ (no. 3050). -

denyut-denyut

acap kali aku buka kembali blog, mesti teringat kata-kata seorang kawan "dah lama kau tak menulis dalam bahasa melayu". aku kemudian fikir, di australia aku rajin menulis dalam bahasa melayu sebab majoriti orang adalah bukan melayu, jadi keinginan untuk berbahasa melayu tu tinggi. tapi bila dah pulang ke tanah air majoriti orang bertutur dalam bahasa inggeris maka aku lebih selesa menulis dalam bahasa inggeris. aku tahu ia paradoks tapi mungkin juga lah ia kerana sifat aku yang suka berahsia, maka kalau boleh, walaupun tidak mungkin, setidak-tidaknya aku dapat rahsiakan apa yang aku rasa dengan menulis dalam bahasa berlainan. yang peliknya, tidak kira di mana aku menulis pasti orang dari dunia mana pun mampu membaca tulisan ini asalkan mereka faham bahasa melayu dan inggeris. tapi itulah, walaupun pelik aku tetap buat seperti mana yang aku rasa.

sudah terlalu lama tak menulis dalam bahasa melayu, kekok benar rasanya.

sejak khamis aku batuk dan selesema, dengan demam dan sakit kepala. sekali bersin berbaki sakitnya di kepala, terasa berpinar-pinar. seluruh badan terutama bahagian kiri semakin lenguh dan sengal rasanya, dan betapa lama tidur pun lenanya tak sampai-sampai, tapi terpaksa kugagahkan juga supaya cepat sihat. harap-harapnya sakitku tidaklah menyusahkan sesiapa dan tidak melarat; begitu fikirku. pertama kali aku mencuba panadol soluble, boleh tahan berkesannya, alhamdulillah. tup tup tap teringat kisah nabi musa; kesakitan sembuh disebabkan oleh Allah bukan ubat, maka aku pun cuba bertahan; moga-moga mendapat keizinan.

kata abah, sakit itu kifarah. oh, semalam dalam mimpi aku jumpa abah. walaupun mimpi tu agak kabur; mungkin sebab aku yang tak berapa sihat, tapi gembiranya dapat berjumpa setelah beberapa waktu. harap-harap abah gembira di sana hendaknya.

hari ini sakitku sudah bertambah kurang, selera makan bertambah baik dan tenagaku cukup untuk membantuku mengemas bilik yang berhabuk dan mencuci cadar dan sarung bantal yang sudah lama tidak dicuci. sambil-sambil mengulang tayang sherlock holmes buat entah beberapa kali, cuba membunuh masa yang cuba membuatkan diri ini bertambah rindu.

tak mengapa, sesungguhnya setiap ketentuan itu ada hikmah dan pengajaran yang dibawanya.

maka aku mencuba menguatkan diri dengan sibuk melayan si kecil arisya yang petah. sudah pandai ber-facebook sekarang, malah lebih pandai ber-smiley daripadaku. ketawa dan komen-komennya sangat jernih dan tulus, bila kumenung-menungkan ingin sekali aku lihatnya senantiasa begitu walaupun jauh dari mungkin. bila semakin dewasa manusia pasti akan berubah menurut pengalaman, ilmu dan perasaannya serta dunia mana yang mencoraknya. dan tiada dunia yang jernih sekarang, betapapun semua menginginkannya. dunia juga semakin tua seperti kita.

malah dengan adegan-adegan yang amat menakutkan. (jika kalian baca buku berjudul 'half the sky' pasti kalian akan mengerti, bagaimana perempuan dilayan di dunia setiap hari. gerun dan menakutkan. ya Allah lindungilah kami keseluruhannya. ameen ameen ameen).

nampaknya sudah lewat..beransur dulu. minta maaf segala salah silap dan terima kasih atas kasih sayang semua. hanya Allah yang mampu membalasnya. ameen, ameen ameen ya Allah.

p/s; aqil sayang, selamat hari lahir. akak kira mesti kamu semakin muda dan dijaga baik di sana kan :)

mak sayang, selamat hari lahir..moga panjang umur, murah rezki dan sentiasa dlm sayang Allah selalu ameen.. =)

Engaged

After a wholesome day of cooking with ma, a happy chatter with him and a good bath always help to unwind me. Right now I'm relaxing with my iPad which I found out to be very convenient whether with or without the Internet. Of course, having Internet with me all the time would be best.

I have never thought that I would be so lucky to own an iPad for free. But that Tuesday really was my day. First I got to attend a session on Geophysical Electromagnetic Prospecting which since I was small I had considerable interest in it. When I went into upper secondary school, during physics classes I had long awaited my teacher for class on electric and electromagentic. I won't say that I was damn good in it but I am crazy in the topic; as the session went on I couldn't stop my hands from shaking because I was too excited to learn more on how they apply electromagnetic principles in hydrocarbon sensing. Therefore I paused from writing and focused solely on what the speaker said and asked some questions. I planned to later copy the notes from syasya.

We rushed to the DesktopLaunch event where Halliburton was launching their new software. We already knew that there would be a lucky draw at the end of the event therefore we didn't forget to bring our business cards. I think we were the last three person who came; I put my business card first followed by syasya and danni. We went in and found ourselves seats; I sat beside afiq and I asked him what the new software was about. From what I understand, it collaborates seismic images and information about a geological area from various sources at the same time depending on what we request it to display, therefore enabling direct comparisons and prospect potential assessment to be done in realtime. I found it as a beneficial tool but I wonder about the computer capacity it would be demanding- and whether it is cost effective. But it was almost time for the launching and presentation to finish and I couldn't wait to copy the notes from syasya so I grabbed her book and started copying. Afiq asked me to share with him what we got from the previous session so I simply went over my notes. He said it was similar with dr deva's presentation but I could seldomly recall it because I didn't really understand what he taught, compared to this presentation which was delivered from a young enthusiasted guy from Irtkusk Company whose hands were also shaking and his breaths fell short whenever he reached a certain interesting point. I could honestly understand that- I am crazy about the topic as well.

When the time came for the lucky draw, we all looked ahead. There was only one lucky draw and also only one iPad to be won, and that was it. The man put his hands into the bowl and took a business card, he then held it in his hand. He was English. He announced that the winner was from Carigali and he would have trouble saying the name right.

"aqilah amir jamalullail..." I put my head up and looked in front. I was still copying notes so I was blurred for a moment when my name was called. When everyone was looking around and my friends were staring at me in an awe, then I realized what was happening. I stood up and made my way through the rows of chairs to a clearing at the center. People were taking pictures and I shyly went on to get my prize. And there I was, receiving a free iPad which I knew almost nothing about and would merely be thinking about having it in breezes.

And right now I'm typing this post through it. Everyone who knows about my winning said that I was very lucky. When I look back, I sure am feel thankful for this, ya Allah. You sure know how to cheer me up :) Alhamdulillah, thank you ya Allah..thank you everyone who pray for my blessed and easy rizq..may it flow rich and blissful for all of us..ameen3...

Happy eidul adha..

yuzo hayashi- yawarakana jikan

its feeling a lil bit weird that im now listening to a song i used to listen to when i feel so lonely. at that time, i am far away from home, unlike now when my house is actually less than two hours by train.

i guess loneliness strikes without really cares how far you are from the things that you miss. and you can never miss something more than when you miss the past, because past is always the farthest.

i miss the past whenever i face difficult times. the thought of abah drowns me most in deep silence, beyond the sounds of passing vehicles and the chirps of the birds and the whistle of the breeze through the grass.

but just like when the rain falls onto the ground, washing away the streets and soaking the leaves with its drops, the thought of 'you' quenches my thirst and makes me feel alive and can walk or even run again. the thought of 'you' keeps me going, even when the deep silence urges me to stop and vanish.

i can smile without guilt again, because of 'you', even when i still miss abah like i always do.

i always do.

thank you, for being the rain of my life, which gives life and hope whenever i feel so low and lonely. i love you my soulmate.

letto - sebelum cahaya

Lagu ini menceritakan tentang kisah kekasih hati yang begitu tabah untuk mencari cinta sejati. Sebelum datangnya cahaya, sudah tentu pahit maung akan ditempuhi. Bukan senang untuk mencari cinta sehingga sanggup melalui perjalanan yang begitu sunyi dan berliku. Perlambangan untuk kata embun pagi memberikan gambaran bahawa cahaya yang dimaksudkan ialah cahaya matahari. Sebagai simbolik kepada cahaya yang dapat menyuluh manusia ke jalan penuh ketenangan dan kebahagian. -Referred to a Website-

Ku teringat hati
Yang bertabur mimpi
Kemana kau pergi cinta
Perjalanan sunyi
Engkau tempuh sendiri
Kuatkanlah hati cinta

Chorus:
Ingatkan engkau kepada
Embun pagi bersahaja
Yang menemanimu sebelum cahaya
Ingatkan engkau kepada
Angin yang berhembus mesra
Yang kan membelaimu cinta

Kekuatan hati yang berpegang janji
Genggamlah tanganku cinta
Ku tak akan pergi meninggalkanmu sendiri
Temani hatimu cinta

Chorus

Ku teringat hati
Yang bertabur mimpi
Kemana kau pergi cinta
Perjalanan sunyi
Engkau tempuh sendiri
Kuatkanlah hati cinta

Chorus